Missing gram

Gosh, I miss you Gram.

You Are An ISFP

The Artist You are a gifted artist or musician (though your talents may be dormant right now). You enjoy spending your free time in nature, and you are good with animals and children. Simply put, you enjoy beauty in all its forms and live for the simple pleasures in life. Gentle, sensitive, and compassionate - you are good at recognizing people's unspoken needs. In love, you are quiet and sweet yet very passionate. You love easily. You have an underlying love for all living things, and it's easy for you to accept someone into your heart. At work, you do best in an unconventional position. You express yourself well and can work with almost anyone. You would make a good veterinarian, pediatrician, or composer. How you see yourself: Sympathetic, kind, and communicative When other people don't get you, they see you as: Incompetent, insecure, and overly sensitive

What's Your Personality Type?

Think that sounds like me?

Meghan broke her arm

Monday night Caleb & Meghan were playing outside. Bart was grilling and I was inside cooking dinner. Meghan fell off the slide, and Bart went to pick her up. I noticed her arm was deformed and panicked. I ran up to my grams, she came down to get Caleb and we got in the car and took her to the ER. Yup, she broke it. It was the worst thing I have ever had to experience as a mother. They had to put her under so they could set it. She has a temporary cast on right now, and we go Friday for more x-rays. I feel so guilty, I wish I had been out there. All I can see is her arm in my mind over and over.
Meghan was such a trooper, she hardly cried on the way there or at the hospital. It was Bart and I who were crying. She is better and acting like herself. Only problem is she wants to run, jump, and be a kid and I am a nervous wreck. Until she has the hard cast on I will worry. I don't want it to move and have to go back in and have them do what they did Monday night. This is going to be a long 4-6 weeks! If you could pray that her arm heals normal, I would appreciate it.

My babies aren't babies anymore!

Caleb & Meghan are 3! I can't believe they are 3 years old already. We started off our day by having breakfast, then we got ready and stopped by "Papa's work" to say hi. Well Caleb was so excited when Papa decided we could go out back and look at all the "big trucks". Meghan was equally as excited. Caleb's huge blue eyes got a big as saucers when he say the "digger" and "bucket loader" oh and don't forget the "roller", that totally made his day. Then we got their favorite "chicken french fries" at McD's and brought it to "Mimi choo-choo's house". They call her that because she lives near a train track and they get to see the trains. Then Caleb and I went to get his haircut. He was so quiet the whole time, the woman asked him questions but he didn't say a word. It's funny because when he is around people he knows, he talks and talks, and Meghan is more quiet. But then they switch when we are out in public. He did sit in the chair all by himself this time. He got a lollipop and got one for Meg too. When we were walking back to my moms house I said "Caleb you're so handsome!" and he said "Caleb cute, Caleb cute" that he is! Tomorrow well actually today since it's so late is their party at Zachary's. I can't wait, they will have so much fun!

Just a few things I don't want to forget...

Last night I made Hamburger stroganoff and Caleb said "mmm, delicious"
Meghan told me I was so cute, and I was wearing my pjs all day.

Rain sucks. Today was a lazy day, the kids watched movies and played with toys. We were supposed to drive and see my mom, but I didn't feel like treking out there to be stressed with my kids. So we stayed home. The kids napped and I promised them that they could go to my grams after nap to see the puppy. They remembered. We got all our stuff on because it is pouring outside. Fun, fun! We go see Juliette (the puppy) she was so excited to see the kids. Until of course the kids were terrorizing her. They just get so excited and don't realize how tiny she is. Usually at my grams the kids are good, especially when I am not there. But man today they were fighting and being mean to the puppy. Ugh I couldn't wait to leave. I was sick of telling them to be nice.

Bart got home at a decent time (shocker) and then I went to Toys R Us to get the rest of their birthday gifts. I picked up Gloria at work and first we went to Costco, and then I decided to run to Ritz Camera to pick up the dvd transfer and my tape. I was so excited that it was done and couldn't wait to watch it. So I decided that maybe I should open it before I leave. Good idea on my part because I take out the dvd and on the cover they have like freeze frames of different parts, well this wasn't my dvd. How did I know? Well they were all African American people on it. Instantly I get pissed because I want to see my tape, and then realize that someone probably has my dvd. This tape that my friend and I made is stupid, but I suppose funny, we were in high school! Anyways, then I check my tape, and they didn't fix it. WTH?! So before I flip I decide maybe this is my dvd and its the wrong cover, after all it does say Kylee & Jen on the cover. I put it in my kids dvd player and start to watch. It's not my tape. It's some other family, cooking on a BBQ with tons of meat on a huge grill. It was sort of funny, or at least Gloria thought so. Then I hear on the DVD the guy say here they are smoking marijuana. I look at the dvd and there they are passing around a joint at the BBQ with tons of people and young children. Gloria by this time is laughing her ass off. I take out the dvd and bring it back in, and tell the guy its not my dvd. He re-fills out all the forms and puts REDO across in big letters. I am bummed! Now I have to wait 3 more weeks!! I swear this ALWAYS happens to me. SIGH.

So anyways I went to TRU and got the kids a water table, Meghan some make-up and a dvd. I already have 2 beach towels with Mickey on them, Mickey Mouse pjs, Minnie pjs, trucks, and cars. That is good, considering I think we own every single toy ever made. Just ask Heidi.

So that was my interesting day.

4 days until Caleb and Meghan are 3!!

You know what annoys me? People at the grocery store. When I shop at night there is a guy who uses this really LOUD machine to polish the floors. I swear that he follows me and tries to piss me off. It is SO not relaxing when that loud machine is on my ass in the store. Then I get to the checkout, and am putting my stuff on the belt. Fine, great, good. Someone walks up behind me and put her stuff on. UMM HELLO?! I am not done putting my stuff on, and in case you didn't notice the belt, it moves. Ugh.

Today was an alright day until, Meghan and Caleb woke up from nap. I went in and Meghan had an explosive poop. It was on her sheets, up her back. Sigh. So I strip her and put her in bath. Strip her bed, disinfect her crib, change the changing table pad and throw in a load of wash. That was tons of fun.

After we were de-pooped we went to Jack's tee ball game. The kids had a blast and it was fun to watch Jack play. I can't wait until we are at Caleb & Meghan's events. After we went to McDonald's for "chicken french fries" as Caleb calls it. It was actually a decent day!!

TGIF

It has been so hot here lately. This is Vermont people!! What the heck? Anyways I enjoy nice weather but I could do a little more without the humidity. The kids love being outside, and the poor kids couldn't nap it was so hot in their room. Yesterday was the mother and daughter banquet, a long time tradition here. I went with my gram, Meggy, my MIL, and sister Nikki and Elise. I don't mind these type of events, I know they mean a lot to my grandmother. The only bad part of the night was that I sat next to someone who had REALLY bad BO. My sister could smell it across the table. Gag. If I had to smell that all the time I could really stick to weight watchers. Maybe I should just fore-go the deodorant.......

Speaking of WW, I have for the most part stayed on. I walked 3 times this week 1.5 miles. We are talking a big hill and dirt roads. My ass burns walking up the hill. But have I lost? Not according to my scale. Yeah, yeah, I hear the whole muscle weighs more than fat deal..but I don't want to be a muscular fat person!! Argh.

Some days I feel like such an old lady. I know that sounds weird, but ever since I had kids its like my friends treat me different, as do some of my family in a way. I guess it's hard to explain. I don't get thought of to do things, cause I have kids. Hello people, I can still go out. I guess its too hard to explain. I feel like I don't fit in many places. I always feel out of my element, whether its at church, mops, or out with friends. I feel like I don't fit in. Like people are always judging me. Even though I am sure that's not always the case.

I stayed pretty well on my diet today, even when my gram brought good homemade cookies down! Yum. The kids did not nap, and they were so cranky! But Gloria came over and we chatted, had a little coffee and then took the kids outside. We did all the normal routine things we usually do. We went across the road and played in the brook, walked around the baseball field, then went through the covered bridge, and down the dirt road to throw rocks in the river.
Bart met us, and we walked back to our house, put the kids in the stroller, and we walked around the block. My legs are so tired!! When I walk with Gloria it goes by pretty fast, cause we chat. The more and more we hang out, the more I realize we have a lot in common. This sounds really sappy, but I am so thankful to have met her.

Tonight the kids were so cute. They had a great bath, and then got their pj's on. I opened the window and they listened for the frogs. They were so cute listening, and we even called mi-mi to tell her.

I have 2 jewelry parties to go to this week! I am going to be broke! I really need to get Meghan's and Caleb's birthday invites done too, I was going to make them myself but I need some cardstock paper.

Did I mention I got some gorgeous presents for my bday? I got a notebook and address book from an online friend who remembered my birthday! She made them, aren't they beautiful. It was so thoughtful.

Monday, Monday

Well today was a busy day. I found out that my mom was going to be in town, so I packed up the kids and went to my moms. She watched them and I ran to Kinney's, Hallmark, the post office, then Gloria called and met up with me. We went in my car, stopped by Ritz Camera to send a video tape to get fixed. Which by the way I can't WAIT to watch, its a stupid silly video from high school with a good friend. Then we went to Walmart I got some exercise pants, which are so comfy! I also got some tubs because I am trying to organize. Then I dropped Gloria off, and went to my moms. Bart met me there and then I went to exercise with Gloria and then went grocery shopping. WHEW!!

I didn't do much this weekend, the weather really sucked. I wanted to go to the maple fest but it rained all weekend pretty much. On Saturday Gloria and I went shopping and then went to dinner at Nicco's an italian restaurant. Then we had a small Ben & Jerry's ice cream. Yum. On Sunday we went to Costco and then watched Elise play softball. She did really well! She was so proud and the kids had a blast there.

In a few weeks, Caleb and Meghan will be 3 years old! I can't believe it. As someone said the days are long, but the years are short. So true.

Long time no post...whats new

Wow, so I suck at resolutions. Oh well.

So my gram's house is sold, they close on the 30th. This really seems to bother me, I would almost feel better if it had just burned down. I know that sounds awful, but then no one would get to have it. I already know they are going to remodel it. That should be really fun when I have to drive by it all the time. Good times.

I am currently doing Weight Watchers and so far have lost 8.2lbs. It seems to come off so slow. This week I am ravenous, thanks Aunt Flo!! ARGH!

My kids are doing good I guess. Meghan has been throwing fits/tantrums left and right over nothing. I can already tell that 3 is going to be fun. They have been loving the weather lately, our new thing is to go across the road and play in the brook. Usually Gram is with us, and I am really grateful that she helps me out so much. I have learned that every day is a gift. My kids are so lucky to have her around, as am I. I am pretty lucky to have twins, they are in deed a handful but they have a close bond and watching them is so cute. I think things have been a little easier with twins like bedtime. They each have each other, and bedtime usually isn't a battle. The cutest thing ever was when Meghan told Caleb she "wubed (loved) him" so cute.

I have finished 2 books, one was Paula Deen's autobiography. It was really good, and a good read I thought. I want to go to Savannah, GA to go to her restaurant sometime. Yum, it all sounds so good. I don't know how people in the south aren't huge if people cook like that down there! The 2nd book I read was 90 Minutes in Heaven. It was a good short book, and made me think a lot. I cried reading his chapter on Heaven, because it was like I knew that my gram was okay.

I had a birthday on April 7th and it was great (besides friends that forgot, some friends huh?). I got a new purse which I love, and a new lense for my camera, coffee :) some money, and a necklace. I also got a new table with chairs and I LOVE IT! It was a bargain too!

I went dancing last weekend with my cousin, aunts, and new friend Gloria. I had a blast and danced my ass off. Maybe that is why I lost so much weight this week! It was a nice break, and I always have fun with my family.

The reason I haven't blogged lately is because it is such a bitch to sign on the desktop. The laptop is fine but the desktop irritates me.

"To Where You Are"

By Josh Groban

Who can say for certain

Maybe you're still here

I feel you all around me

Your memory's so clear

Deep in the stillness

I can hear you speak

You're still an inspiration

Can it be (?)

That you are mine

Forever love

And you are watching over me from up above

Fly me up to where you are

Beyond the distant star

I wish upon tonight

To see you smile

If only for awhile to know you're there

A breath away's not far

To where you are

Are you gently sleeping

Here inside my dream

And isn't faith believing

All power can't be seen

As my heart holds you

Just one beat away

I cherish all you gave me everyday

'Cause you are my

Forever love

Watching me from up above

And I believe

That angels breathe

And that love will live on and never leave

Fly me up

To where you are

Beyond the distant star

I wish upon tonight

To see you smile

If only for awhile

To know you're there

A breath away's not far

To where you are

I know you're there

A breath away's not far

To where you are

So finally Bart is not working so much. It has been so nice to have him home at night. The kids especially love it. So last night we called Dell and finally on our own fixed the cd burner, it only took like 2 hours. I thought today was Thursday. I was a little disappointed when I figured out it was only freakin Wednesday. Tomorrow I might go have dinner & drinks with some friends from High School. I can't freakin wait, I hope it all works out so that I can go. I need a night out.

I rarely go to the grocery store with the kids. I usually go on the weekends. Well this past weekend I couldn't and it screws up my whole week. So gram said why don't we go..so we went yesterday. This is how it started off. We tell the kids we are going to the grocery store, and they are excited because we are actually leaving the house. So they are getting ready, I go out to warm up the car. It doesn't start. I was cursing, seriously WTF. It would turn over but nothing, and I had a full tank of gas. So the benefit of living in a small, minuscule community is that I call the guy who owns the garage and he drives down, has some dry gas, puts that in tries, nothing. Then he freakin floors the gas, all of a sudden POP and it starts. I was like how much do I owe ya? 5.00. Can't beat a small town sometime. So we get the kids loaded, and head on our way. Caleb was so good at the store, and Meghan was having a freakin fit towards the end. Stresses me out, and then I forget stuff, and buy bad things. LOL She was stressing me out, so I decided to get my favorite homemade Cusson's donuts. DAMN they are good. Anyways, we leave there and the kids see McDonald's and immediately start in. As Caleb calls it "Chicken-french fries" so I ask gram, and we go. They are actually pretty good there, and eat. Towards the end they were being goofy and marching and going in circles, but they were okay. Then I got the car washed, not sure why since I have to drive on a freakin dirt road home. Caleb was scared and informed me that "No like it mommy, no like it!" Then we drive home, and the dirt road is mostly mud, it is like driving on ice at some points and my car is all dirty again. What a stressful long day!! I don't think we will be doing that anytime soon. I enjoy my Sunday grocery shopping alone.

Now for some random facts:

• I love Ellen DeGeneres
• I currently like the song "Colorblind" By Counting Crows
• I am breaking out, and I never do! Damn heavy period
• I am dreading grammie leaving for Arizona for a week

Happy Birthday Gram

Happy Birthday Gram. Hope you are celebrating in Heaven with our family. I love & miss you beyond words.

I'm sick of grieving. Does that sound bad? I am though. I think I am doing better and then I have bad days. It sucks. I miss my gram so much. I still can't believe that she is gone. It doesn't help driving past her house either. Still for sale, no one has bought it. I am sort of glad because I am not ready to see it filled with strange people. My other gram that lives next door helps me every day which I have said before. Well all I can think about lately is what if something happens to her? My kids won't understand, I will be living up here without her. I try and not think about it, and enjoy my time left with her. I guess I am just not ready to deal with another death right now. I wish I would dream about my gram or something. I really do miss her. You know what I should have done? This sounds really weird and odd, I'm sure but I should have taped my gram with a mini tape recorder. Her voice. Then I could listen to her whenever I wanted. Her birthday is the 21st of this month. She would have been 77.

I slept for crap last night. I always do when Bart is gone. It sucks. I guess I should be in bed since Bart has to work on a Saturday!! Ugh. Lately Caleb has been crying for him :( I have also had this nagging cough and runny nose for like a month. It's really starting to irritate me.

Tonight I watched Trading Spouses. I could not believe this one mother on there. She was so ignorant. She hated gays, Hispanics, etc etc. It was so annoying, I hate people like that. I hope she learned something from her experience and maybe can be more open minded.

Ok, so I suck at resolutions huh? Well tonight for some reason I could not get into blogger. I am so irritated with this computer. Ok, lets see. We got ourselves for Christmas this brand new HP computer, well we get it, take it of the box, set it up, it doesn't work. RIGHT OUT OF THE DAMN BOX, and it DOESN'T WORK!!!!!!!!! So Bart called HP and talked with tech support for 2.5 hours to accomplish nothing. Then we were going to send it back, well everyone we talked to had no idea it seemed like. We kept getting switched etc, etc. Finally we talk to someone and told them we were sending it back and wanted a refund. We had such a horrible experience with HP customer service we decided to just get a Dell. So we order a Dell, and get it, take it out of the box and it works! YAY! But the speakers don't. Ok, no big deal. Well 3 weeks later, the computer randomly shuts down, and then I get a blue screen. Over and over. I call Dell tech support and talk with the very nice guy for 2 hours. We concluded that they needed to come out here and fix it. The guy comes fixes it, and it is working good, except...now my cd drive does not work. It did before. Sigh. WTH!!! Seriously, I could snap on this thing. I don't mind calling tech support, but I don't have 2-3 hours to devote to talking to them with my kids here. So I need to wait until someone can watch them or something I guess.

Not much else is going on in my boring life. Sigh. Bart is working long hours, and I hardly get to see him. It sucks, cause I could use a break and the kids miss him lots. I hate tax season, for this reason. My mom has offered to watch the kids overnight so Bart and I could get away but everywhere I look they mostly require 2 night minimum. That is so irritating. If we are going to stay somewhere I want it to be nice and not like a regular room at the Holiday Inn.

Enchiladas de Pollo y Queso

Here is the recipe I made:

Enchiladas de Pollo y Queso (Kathy-imajacobs)
5 T butter
1 cup chopped onion
2 cups cooked chicken, chopped or shredded
4 oz chopped green chilies
1/4 cup flour
1 T chili powder
1/2 tsp ground coriander
1/2 tsp. ground cumin
2 1/2 cups chicken broth
1 cup sour cream
1 1/2 cups shredded Monterey Jack
12 tortillas-I prefer flour
Melt 2 T. butter and cook onions until softened. Remove to a bowl. Add chicken and green chilies. Melt remaining butter. Blend in flour and seasonings. Whisk in chicken broth. Cook, stirring until sauce boils. Remove from heat. Stir in sour cream and 1/2 cup cheese. Stir 1/2 cup sauce into chicken mixture. Spoon chicken mixture into tortillas and roll up. Place in 9x13 pan. Top with remaining sauce and cheese. Bake uncovered at 350 for about 25 minutes

I added more chicken and cheese, and it only made enough for 7 big size tortillas. I left out coriander (cause I don't like it) and cumin cause I didn't have any. I added hot sauce also. These were DELICIOUS!

Ok, Ok, I gotta keep up and get in habit with this. That is one of my resolutions and all. Not much to say really, I do the same shit everyday. I pretty much stay in my jammies all day, clean up messes, stop fights, etc etc. Tomorrow is MOPS (Mother of Preschoolers) I dread it. Not because its boring but because I have to peel Meghan off me to go. I love MOPS, and really look forward to the break but I hate drop off. Hate it. But I am going, and Meghan will just have to deal I guess. Maybe it will be better this time? Ahhh probably not. Oh well. How am I ever going to do preschool?
My kids have switched on me once again. Caleb is now the hard one. Meghan is easier. It could change back. Caleb is really testing the limits. He is throwing, screaming (I HATE THAT!), not sharing at all, throws tantrums etc. I hope he is good at MOPS or they probably will be like GREAT she's here with her twins again (insert eye roll).
I made some YUMMY enchalidas tonight. The only thing I didn't like was how long it took. I boiled my chicken and then shredded it. That took forever it seems! It could be because I had to stop fights, in between it all. It was delish though!! I felt somewhat like a wife. LOL
Okay, its late gotta pack the diaper bags, and all that jazz.
Peace out!

I have 3 children...

I have 3 children, my third being Bart. He woke up late today, and then asked me to get up to help him. Start the coffee, etc. He sounds like a herd of elephants running around when he is late. Sigh. At least I got to take a shower before Caleb and Meghan were up. Meghan woke up with a fever. Sigh. It never ends! I am not sure if she has a sinus infection or an ear infection. We all have colds. You can just tell she feels crappy. I was going to call the dr, but decided to wait because right now she is sleeping fine.
I feel like I accomplished something today! I swept and then mopped the kitchen floor, cleaned off the kitchen table, wiped all the chairs down. Now I am taking a break.
I am trying to get the church website up and running. I hope I can, because it would be a good addition to our church. I am just waiting to hear from my pastor.
Now to decide whats for dinner?

Bart and I started dating 10 years ago today. Wow I can't believe it! It has been so long. LOL. He was 15 and I was 17, and the rest is history. We have only been married though for 3.5 years.

I am glad actually that the holidays are over, and things are getting back on schedule. I love Christmas time but this year the kids got sick, and my niece and nephews did too. Also we crammed every ones gatherings in 4 days. It was a bit much, and you don't really get to enjoy the holiday. Now we are all dealing with colds. I can deal with that any day though!!

Today we went to my dads and went sliding and made a snowman. The kids loved it, and really enjoy being outside despite the cold. I actually don't enjoy going outside, but this year I got snow pants and boots, and it hasn't been too bad actually. I think seeing the kids enjoy it so much makes it worth the hassle.

I wanted to stay home today and get some stuff done. My house is a wreck. The kids have WAY too many toys, and we have no space. Not sure where I can give toys away. They don't have any place like goodwill in VT that I know of.

My other gram (Marion) who helps me everyday doing laundry and the kids and the list goes on and on...anyways she doesn't like to drive and feels that she shouldn't. I have told her numerous times that I would love to drive her where ever she wants to go. She is so stubborn! I love to help her and it also feels like I am repaying her for EVERYTHING she does for me. I guess I will have to keep telling her. I think that is what I miss about my other gram. I used to do errands for her and help her. I felt like I had worth. When she died, I felt sort of useless.

Well it is late, but so far so good on keeping my resolution of blogging more!